Macklemore Penis Song Lyrics

Ladies and gentlemen
Introducing, the p____ song.
(Oh no he didn't)
(Honk a d___)

This is my p____ song
I wish that I had a bigger shlong
One that was quite a bit more thick and way more long
One of those p___o king kong dongs

Check it out
I wish my d___ was bigger, I can admit it
I'm above average on inches but I want a d___ double digit
If I had a big ol' c___ what would I do?
I'd probably go to Florida and show it Katrina and screw
Get buck naked and start streaking at my school
And get arrested but at least the girls would be impressed
With my third leg and, and then I'd go to a keg and
Do a keg stand, get drunk and do the running man
With no clothes on just to show off
My d___'s bigger than yours when mine is cold and soft
Haha, oh yeah I forgot that's not really the c___ that I have
I went out and party-bagged 'em and quickly opened the package
And it fit me like Kriss Kross's old school starter jackets
Trying to convince myself like, "Size doesn't matter,"
Anyways I'd probably just put it on backwards cause I mean
I know that god made us all different and special
But s___ did he really have to invent lopsided t_______s?
I don't have them I just feel bad for the like you know the guys with like
Their left one hangs like lower than the right, kinda like a lazy eye like on your b____
I mean I don't know, I just feel bad

This is my p____ song
I wish that I had a bigger shlong
One that was quite a bit more thick and way more long
Fellas if ya'll feel me sing along

Yo ladies
Yeah?
Ladies!
Yeah?
Do you want a guy with an average d___?
Hell no
Then- wait you don't?
No you honkey d___
Okay that's cool, no that's fine

I promise, I'm so self conscious
That's why you never see me skinny dippin' in August
Always walkin' around with my hands in my pockets trying to pump blood into my guy Alfonso
I mean, g______ I don't think you girls understand
I've had a complex since that song Short Short Man
And even though girls have told me that I'm big when I watch a p___o I feel like a little kid
I mean, let's take Ron Jeremy
Now if a girl sees him she'll compare him to me
And every MC in hip hop has got a huge c___
Or at least talks about it in every song that they've got
I mean, s___
If I was really hung I'd make a whole album called Me and My d___
With interludes of all the girls that I'd been with
And talk about my package and multiple o_____s
'Cause all that I see is that size does matter
We got Enzite, p____ pumps surgery to v_____
But when it all adds up you can't really change it
I'm not a p___o star I just gotta face it
You know, what can I do
This song goes out to like all the like little bit above average dudes
So like all the small dudes, medium dudes but all you big dudes stop

This is my p____ song
I wish that I had a bigger shlong
One that was quite a bit more thick and way more long
Fellas if ya'll feel me sing along Lyrics © OBO APRA/AMCOS

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