MC Lars Horris Internet Relationships (Are Not Real Relationships) Lyrics
Last updated: 10/04/2011 12:00:00 PM
Internet relationships are not real
Your heart people steal but identities conceal
So here’s a tale of warning for girls and boys
Laptop computers can be dangerous toys
DARYL47: In the chat room, I inspect. Who’s here tonight? ASL check
CarolBabe69: I’m 20/f from the UK. Send me an IM and I’ll make your day
DARYL47: I’m 22 and my name is Daryl
CarolBabe69: Nice to meet you Daryl my name is Carol
DARYL47: What do you like Carol?
CarolBabe69: I like to go to shows. I collect comic books and vintage clothes
What do you like?
DARYL47: I like to skate. I play rock guitar, but I’m not that great
I like to go on dates and I like to stay up late
I live in San Francisco and hangin' on the Haight
CarolBabe69: Do you like the Golden Gate?
DARYL47: I did when I was eight
CarolBabe69: Maybe I can come and visit?
DARYL47: Maybe you should wait
See I’m really forty-seven, I have kids and a wife
I weight 300 pounds and I hate my life
CarolBabe69: Are you serious?
CarolBabe69: Well, I’ve got a secret too. I’m not 20 years old, I’m really 32
I only have one leg and I like to sniff glue
DARYL47: You lied to me Carol
CarolBabe69: Well, you lied to me too
It’s not normal to have an Internet girlfriend.
Online relationships are just pretend
Unplug your heart, upgrade your system.
Get, get off the Internet
Bob went on MySpace for hours a day.
Talking to girls from Moscow to LA
But people can surprise you from behind a screen
Listen to this verse and you’ll see what I mean
SueChick1990: Hi, I’m Susie, I like your profile
I checked out your pics and I like your style
BOBSTER MAN: Sounds good Susie, I’ll be your friend
We can message each other again and again
SueChick1990: Comment on my pics and post on my page
Join my groups and guess my age!
BOBSTER MAN: You must be 18, how could you not?
You can’t be in high school you’re just too hot
SueChick1990: Let me send you pics for your personal collection
I hope they inspire you and give you a smile
Susie sent Bob pics that were borderline obscene
The cops showed up at his door – she was only 16
If you don’t believe us here’s a final story
About a boy named Marcus and his online girlfriend Lorie
Behind the monitor, truth is hidden from your eyes
Marcus didn’t know but he was in for a surprise
MARCUSP: We’ve been dating for a while but let’s cut to the chase
I don’t know what you look like, and I want to see your face
Laurie69: But what does it matter? You know who I am inside
MARCUSP: What if you’re not a woman and this whole time you lied?
Laurie69: You got me there, I’m not really a female
I’m a guy who pretends to be a girl through email
MARCUS: So this is why it’s bad to meet women online
Living life behind the screen is a total waste of time!
REPEAT CHORUS(2 times)
Online relationships(repeat 8 times)
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