|  |
Cobra Starship Biography
Review The Artist (5)
Source: http://www.cobrastarship.com/fangs/
Gabe Saporta was born in Montevideo, Uruguay, a tiny wedge of a country between Argentina and Brazil. At age four he immigrated to Queens with dreams of becoming a rockstar. His father, Diego, who had been a doctor in Uruguay, sold scarves on the streets of Manhattan to support his son's habits.
By age twenty, Gabe was well on his way to realizing his dream. In typical rockstar fashion, he crafted existentialist drivel out of his big bag of regurgitated bullshit, developed a messiah complex big enough to house a couple of homeless people, and spread his "gospel" to the four corners of the earth. Also in typical rockstar fashion, he talked a lot of shit, picked fights, and ended up in a bunch of legal battles
When it finally came crashing down, Gabe found himself lost--living a life without meaning or purpose.
So Gabe headed for the arid wastelands of the Arizona desert to contemplate his existence.
*************
In the desert, Gabe spends his days and nights pondering the nature of being, the collective unconscious, the irreducible complexity of bacteria flagellum, and perfecting blue steel--it's more of a softer look; he uses it for footwear.
However, every evening his meditations are interrupted by mysterious lights plaguing the night sky. On one particular such night, the lights are so mesmerizing that Gabe enters into a trance-like state. He becomes catatonic and weightless, so weightless in fact that he begins to levitate.
But just as Gabe is beginning to lift off the ground, a cobra lunges from the depths of the darkness and bites him! Bites him right in the fucking neck!
After a week on the brink of death, hallucinating from the venomous bite, he awakes to find the snake with a wet towel in its fangs, patting down Gabe's sweltering forehead.
"Holy shit," Gabe exclaims, "this snake that almost killed me is patting down my forehead with a moist towelette!"
"Good morning to you too," says the reptile.
"Holy Shit! A talking snake!"
"I am a cobra," corrects the snake, "and the lights that have hounded you night after night are from the starship that brought me here. You see, I have been sent from the future to find you."
"Me?" Gabe asks, flattered and excited at the possibility of validating his existence. "Am I supposed to save the world!?"
"Uh, no," replies the cobra. "Not exactly. You see kid, there is no salvation." The cobra goes on to tell Gabe about the world's final days. Cobras were the only ones who survived.
Shocked by this tale of Armageddon, Gabe finally asks in bewilderment, "then what do you need me from me? What is my destiny?"
"The purpose of your life is to make sure mankind goes out in style."
"How do I do that?"
"By teaching hipsters to not take themselves so seriously and by telling emo kids to stop being pussies. How's that for a start?"
Look for When The City Sleeps, We Rule The Streets in stores October 10th on Decaydance / Fueled By Ramen. |
Would you please submit the latest Cobra Starship biography to me? Thank You.
|
Review about Cobra Starship
WOW EMO?? | Reviewer: MLE | 9/11/2008ok well im like hell "emo" haha well i dress it and listen to it, but i aint no fucing pussie i dnt cut myself and i fucking love cobra starship, i see you guys last month with panic at the disco in perth Western Australia
you guys rocked and i cant stop listening to viva la cobra! that album over and over and i never get sick of it :)
FANGS UP!
even check out my space
www.myspace.com/mle_loves_ville_valo
I LOVE COBRA STARSHIP
You guys rock my socks | Reviewer: Peter Power | 4/28/2008
Hey,
Nice bio. I was just wondering for more info on Gabe I'm doing my Spanish project on you because that's how much you rock.
Like you guys have amazing lyrics.
I'm in a small time local band myself, but my lyrics all suck I wish I could write like you.
Anyway if you could, would you send me some info?
Thanks.
wow, thats a lot.. | Reviewer: Danielle | 11/28/2007
wow,you went through pretty much growing up.. i hope its way better now...
cant wait to see you guys on the REALLY REALLY RIDICULOULY GOOD LOOKING TOUR!
you guys did great on Sleeping with Giants.
i'm glad you guys are headling this tour.
xxoo-Danielle
p.s FANGS UP SUCKERS!
About Gabe Saporta | Reviewer: Eliza Chevrilla | 8/16/2007
Hi, Cobra Starship!
I'm Eli, from Indonesia. I want 2 know all about Gabe Saporta and Elisa. I can't find Gabe Saporta 4 the correct. I need more information about him, and Elisa.
Thanks 4 now,
Eli
i love thisss | Reviewer: Kelsey | 7/3/2007
the story thing in your biography is awesome. its pretty amazing. your music is amazing too. its all i listen to on my ipod. :)
Review the Artist Cobra Starship
| |
|
